I hang on to everything I can find of Logan’s such as his pictures, his running shoes, his special shirts and his goal boards. As I go through his room, I find written treasures tucked away in a book or crumpled up deep in a drawer.
Today, I came across one of the first pieces he wrote as a teenager when he was in middle school. Logan was not a literary genius and wrote very much like a child, but he had a way in getting his point across clearly, simply and heartfelt. And this message is better than any Sunday sermon I have heard in a while. He speaks to me always.
Why most ordinary people are heroes…by Logan
Saving the world, killing evil and all of that is pretty heroic. But the “regular” people can perform even more heroic things, but most of the time, they are not recognized. Real heroes usually aren’t recognized. They are ordinary people who are thankful and put others before them.
Ordinary people can be real heroes because they care a lot about their friends and family, but what makes them heroes is that they put the people they love before them. Being a hero doesn’t always mean saving the world, but taking care of your family and watching out for other people or trying to cheer a friend up when they’re down is absolutely a heroic thing to do because it shows a lot of character. Just because you are an ordinary person or civilian does not mean you can’t be a hero. Stopping or help stopping bullying in your school is a great example of being a hero because you are helping someone from getting hurt. Being mindful of what you say to other people is definitely a good thing to do.
One thing a hero really needs to be is thankful for what they have. The more thankful he/she can be, they’ll have a bigger desire to keep people safe. When you are thankful for what you have, then simple things in life are going to seem more appealing to you.
It’s more than keeping a memory alive
When loved ones die, you often hear, “in memory of” or “remember the good times” or “keep his memory alive.” I can say that is true with most deaths. I have experienced the death of my parents, sister and even Logan’s dad – my husband many years ago. But the death of a child is completely different. You do not heal or get over it. There is no moving on or letting go of grief. It is the grief that keeps you going because the grief is the new relationship you have with your child. Grief is love.
I am just eight months into my grief journey and look to other bereaved parents as my heroes. I have learned from them that I can survive and grow as long as I allow myself to feel the pain when it comes, to not deny it, to strengthen my grief muscles so I can take the next breath. ..and to connect with my son in a new way.